No F-Bombs Allowed!...
3/4/2015
Have you ever felt hopeless about life? You have a dream or a goal and you don’t know where to start, how to start and so you don’t! Sometimes you let your emotions get the best of you and all of a sudden you are sad, mad, disappointed and worried all at the same time! Sad because you want to do something but you haven’t started. Then you get mad at yourself for feeling sad. Then you get disappointed because things aren’t going fast enough and then you get worried that you are doing it wrong, that people will either judge you or not support you and so you drop an F-bomb and say, “FORGET IT ALL!” Whoa there! Before you go dropping F-Bombs and killing your dreams how about you take a deep breath and a handful of chill pills and a few seats. Obviously this dream or goal is important to you or you would not be filled with so much emotion. Am I right? There is something about this dream/goal that keeps you up at night that you desire sooo much to see it happen! You think about it all the time, people often say how you should be doing it and you are thinking to yourself, I AM TRYING, but this is hard, I need help, what should I do next, who should I talk to.. and so on and so on. Your mind is going one hundred miles a minute and I need you to pause! ONCE again, take a deep breath and a handful of chill pills and a few seats, one seat for each butt cheek. When you get overwhelmed like this you are no good! You can’t think straight, function properly or accomplish any goals. Feeling overwhelmed like THIS will cause you to feel hopeless. “But what do I do Cherise?” I am so glad you asked! First, you need to remember who you are and who you are not! You are not a fearful, worrisome and hopeless girl! NO, not at all! You are fearfully and wonderfully MADE! You can do all things through Christ! You are confident and the last time I checked, confident girls don’t quit they keep on going! Second, take the pressure off of yourself! If God has give you a desire He will make sure that it comes to pass, but you have to keep on working. Do not think for one second that because you are starting off small that what you are doing is not important. If you keep on going watch how big your dreams will grow! Thirdly, remember it is a process! You are a work in progress and so are your dreams. Everything in life goes through a process. Take yourself for example, you were born a baby and then over time, through a process, you started to change, develop and grow. Just like you, your dreams need time. In the meantime, keep on thinking about your dreams, planning, and practicing until they reach its full potential. Do not get all cray cray and bent out of shape during the process. Keep on believing! I believe in you! XOXO, Cherise “Don’t Forget Your Confidence.”
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I want to know if there is anyone out there in the world that has a closet full of clothes, containers full of accessories and still nothing to wear?! It’s like no matter how many times you open and close your closet NOTHING is there for you to wear! Guess what? You are not alone my friend. This happens to me quiet often! I don’t know what the root causes of these wardrobe farts are. You see, I can get dressed without a problem on any random day. BOOM! Pants, shirt, blazer, accessories, DONE!.. and I look cute! But then there is “that day” when I have to go to a special event where I loose all of my stylish creativity… I have a complete “wardrobe fart.” For starters, a wardrobe fart is a term that I made up (I think I did anyway, since I never heard of it before). It is similar to a brain fart except it has to deal with clothes. It is when you look in your closet and instead of seeing your wardrobe you see everything in black and grey. You can’t see color and you don’t know how to put a simple outfit, a like shirt with pants, together. You find yourself in a frantic panic and try on every single outfit in your closet and nothing looks right because for some odd reason your eyes are playing a mean trick on you! AHHHH!!! THE AGONY! AHHH! THE CLOTHES! AHHH! THE MESS!! Who is going to clean this room now? SMH ANYWHOOO! This happens to me, for the most part on Sunday’s, right before church and when I have photo shoots. I have no idea why. It could be that I am over thinking it or I am trying too hard to look cute when I know I am cute. Can you relate? The better question to ask is: Why does this happen? Sadly, I have no clue. I think this is one of those questions that we will never get the answer to, kind of like how many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop?… The world may never know. I don’t know about you, but that is ok with me. I think it’s ok if girls have issues with finding clothes to wear. BUT I HAVE GOOD NEWS! God cares about what we wear and He wants to help us out! Check this out! In Matthew 6:25 (NIV) Jesus tells us not to worry about our life, what we will eat, drink or wear because life is more than food and clothes. I like to believe that Jesus knew we would have these wardrobe farts and He gave us the solution so we would not have to deal with these farts every again! Are you ready? Here are 3 things you can do to get rid of WARDROBE FARTS! 1. Don’t worry about it, relax– Do not stress or make a big deal out of your outfit. It will come together. Take a step back and breathe because it’s not about what you wear! You are more important than the clothes you wear. Philippians 4:6 says Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. 2. Know that God’s got you- God takes care the flowers in the field! Don’t you see how beautiful they are? Don’t you think God will dress you and take care of you? The Message Bible (Matthew 6:27-29) Has anyone by fussing in front of the mirror ever gotten taller by so much as an inch? All this time and money wasted on fashion—do you think it makes that much difference? Instead of looking at the fashions, walk out into the fields and look at the wildflowers. They never primp or shop, but have you ever seen color and design quite like it? The ten best-dressed men and women in the country look shabby alongside them. Matthew 6:30-33“If God gives such attention to the appearance of wildflowers—most of which are never even seen--don’t you think he’ll attend to you, take pride in you, do his best for you? What I’m trying to do here is to get you to relax, to not be so preoccupied withgetting, so you can respond to God’s giving. People who don’t know God and the way he works fuss over these things, but you know both God and how he works. Steep your life in God-reality, God-initiative, God-provisions. Don’t worry about missing out. You’ll find all your everyday human concerns will be met. 3. Pray about it- God wants you to pray about everything! Yes, even about what you should wear! God cares about you! Other people may not think a wardrobe fart is a big deal, but to God, He cares about everything that concerns you! 1 Thessalonians 5:17 says, “be cheerful no matter what; pray all the time; thank God no matter what happens. This is the way God wants you who belong to Christ Jesus to live.” So take the pressure off of yourself and give it to God by asking Him to help you get your outfits together. Ask God to remove the grey and black from your eyes so you won’t have wardrobe farts. AND HE WILL DO IT! XOXO, Cherise “Don’t Forget Your Confidence.” We have all been there. As the singer Monica would say, “It’s just one of those days that a girl goes through.” You know the type of day I am talking about. You wake up in the morning and you feel out of place. You look in the mirror and you hate what you see. You don’t want to talk to anyone and you don’t want to be bothered. It’s just one of those days. The crazy thing is you look exactly as you did yesterday but for some reason nothing feels right, looks right or fits right and if someone even looks at you the wrong way you just might turn green, and transform into the Incredible Hulk and rip their head off! It sounds extreme now but when you are in the moment it seems pretty rational. It’s days like this that people would assume that it’s “that time of the month” or you are PMSing. But no, It’s just one of those weird days that all of us girls have (okay, it might be that time of the month, so what). Sometimes our hormones get the best of us and we overreact, are easily angered, feel horrible about ourselves and doubtwhat we do and what we want to accomplish all at the same time. Girls are naturally emotional and it does not take much to trigger an emotion in us whether it is a positive or negative emotion. You cannot get rid of the hormones that trigger your emotions but you can control how you respond and react when you feel certain emotions trying to takeover. You can have control of your emotions! When you take control of your emotions people won’t be afraid to talk to you or ask you questions. You will not be labeled as a ticking time bomb or worse, The Incredible Hulk! How can you control your emotions? Well, I am so glad you asked honey! I have a list that I’d like to call: CHECK YOSELF (yes, YO-self!) Before you Wreck YOSELF and KILL YOSELF and YO Friends.. (I might have to work on the name of this list, but in the meantime, here are 4 tips to help you control those crazy emotions.) 1. Call It Out! When you start to feel an emotion rise up that is negative, recognize how you are feeling. You may have to stop and say, “Ok, I am starting to feel angry.” Do not just go from 0-100 (don’t be like Drake), meaning don’t be so quick to lose your cool. Identify your feelings and name them. 2. Count to 50! When emotions rise they will either draw you to or pull you away from something. Before you act, count! Count to 50 and stop what you are doing. Sit somewhere and calm down. 3. Count the cost. Think about how your emotional response or action will affect you, your day and those around you. Pray! Ask God to help you to calm down. 4. Counter-attack! Speak positively about yourself and tell your emotions that YOU are in control! When you wake up on the wrong side of bed and your emotions are all out of whack, tell yourself how you are feeling, and as you walk to the bathroom count to 50 and think about how your day will be affected if you allow yourself to continue to feel the way you do and pray, asking God for help. Lastly, look at yourself in the mirror and tell those emotions to beat it! You have dreams to fulfill and goals to accomplish! Tell those emotions you are the boss and they have to get out of the way. After you have done that smile, put on your confidence and walk out of the door! Don’t forget your confidence! XOXO, Cherise Being Pregnant At Sixteen Is NOT So Bad.
2/11/2015
WOOOWHOOO!!!! I’m so excited! I just can’t hide it! I’m not going to lose control but I am just so full of excitement and happy feelings! I want to hug everyone and everything! I just might want to hug a tree for the first time in life! LOL Why am I so full of cheer? Hmmm. It could be a number of things. I could have won the lottery! I could have received a call from Oprah! I could have been bitten by the love bug and as a result I am so in love that I just want to and hug everything and everyone that I see! Well, sadly it is none of thee above… Not yet anyway! God-mom Oprah will be calling me soon and when she does you will be first to know! Ok, ok, ok! I will spill the beans and let you know why I am so excited! Can you guess though? Come on! LOL Well since you can’t guess let me tell you! I just found out that my 16-year-old cousin is PREGNANT! No, she is not married, she doesn’t even have a boyfriend but this is great news! She has figured out what she wants to do with her life! She wants to graduate from High School with honors and go to college to become a DOCTOR! She is pregnant Y’ALL! I am going to have a cousin-doctor in my family! I can’t wait for her to give birth to her dreams! Are you confused yet? My cousin is 16 and pregnant with dreams and goals! She will give birth and when she does she will be a doctor! This is the kind of pregnant I am talking about. Pregnant with goals! You should be pregnant too! What is it that you want to do with your life? What dreams and goals do you have deep down within you that you are willing to work towards until you give birth? We all have something that we want to accomplish in life. In other words, we are all pregnant with something and the beauty of all of this is that you don’t have to wait until you are 16 and you can be pregnant more than once! You can get pregnant NOW! Start thinking about your future NOW and start a pregnancy pact with your friends NOW! Get your friends together and think of ways you can achieve your goals together… AND CHASE AFTER THEM NO MATTER WHAT!! START NOW! I have a confession! I, Cherise Folkes, aka Cherise Styles was also pregnant AND I have given birth! Yes! I gave birth to a beautiful book called “BOOST YOUR CONFIDENCE WITH COMPLIMENTS”! Yes, a book, not a real baby per se. However, this is my second child! The first book I wrote was called “The ABC’s of Wearing Your Confidence.” After much pushing and determination I have it! You see, it is not that hard, but you have to be strong and a little stubborn about your pregnancy. You have to tell yourself, “Self, no matter what, I am have going to have this baby and we will not give up and abort our dreams.” Now, you know when you start to pursue your dreams people will start to hate, talk bad about you and try to bring you down. Do not worry because my babies, “BOOST YOUR CONFIDENCE WITH COMPLIMENTS” and “The ABC’s of Wearing Your Confidence” will help you to deliver your baby. Let me tell you a little bit about my new baby… The first book I wrote was for girls 7-12 years old. This book is for EVERYONE! It does not matter if you are 7, 27, 47 or 107! This baby of mine is jam packed with compliments that will boost your confidence, make you smile and add some pep to your step! I mean, who doesn’t like a compliment? We all do! But sometimes we get overlooked. We do great at school, in work or at church and we never get the recognition we feel that we deserve! So what do you do? I will tell you! This is when you compliment yourself! In my book, “BOOST YOUR CONFIDENCE WITH COMPLIMENTS,” I give you compliments that you want to hear and compliments that YOU NEED to hear! They will make feel great about who you are! With this book you no longer have to look for compliments from anyone EVER again. So the next time you get over looked, or that guy does not notice your new hairdo, or your friends don’t give you a congratulations you will be ok and it will not be the end of the world because you have a whole book of compliments in your back pocket! I want you to boost your confidence and I know you can with this book aka MY BABY! You can pre-order your copy TODAY before it hits the stores! If you or someone you know is pregnant with dreams they are going to need a boost of confidence to help them along the way! Don’t delay, get your book today and as always don’t forget your confidence! XOXO, Cherise (Order My Baby) Quiet Time On The Toilet.
2/4/2015
When was the last time you went to the bathroom, closed the door, locked it, sat on the toilet and just… listened to yourself? HA! You probably thought I was going to say poop? No, I won’t be blogging about poop today. I’ll save that for another day when I have a brain fart and can’t think of anything else to talk about. :-) ANYWHOOO!! When was the last time you got in a quiet place with no interruptions and spent some alone time alone with yourself, on purpose, with no cell phone or music playing in the background? In this day and age you probably don’t have time to sit still! I mean, there are people to see, posts to read, Vines to watch and statuses to like and people to unfollow! Are you kidding me? Who has time to sit in silence (I hope you can sense the sarcasm). I know those are your thoughts and feelings, but let me tell you something HONEY BOO BOO CHILD! Taking the time to listen to yourself can be very beneficial. How so CHERISE? Glad you asked! Here are some benefits to spending some time alone with YOU! 1. You get a chance to clear your head. Throughout the day you are bumping into and talking to annoying and rude people. You see crazy things on social media that affect your mood and your thinking and so you need to take a break to help release the crap you have been ingesting all day. 2. You get to know who you are. I am always talking about you should get to know YOURSELF and figure out your likes and dislikes. What better way to do that than to spend some quality, uninterrupted time, with YOU! You can ask yourself questions to get to know the type of person you are because you are constantly changing! AND 3. You can evaluate your life! As you are sitting and having quiet time with yourself you can think about where you are in life, where you want to be in life and where you see yourself going in life! Create a 5 year plan and start to work towards it! If your life is crappy, you can flush the messy parts down the toilet and start fresh! You can get a new hobby, make new friends or create a vision board. You can make plans to have a fresh scented present and future that is not masked by a pleasant scent. Do you get it? Do you see how important it is! I hope so! Start now! Get to your bathroom a.k.a YOUR QUIET place and release that load… (LOL Sorry, I couldn't resist) What are some other benefits to spending time with yourself that you can come up with? Comment Below! Xoxo, Cherise *Don’t Forget Your Confidence The Naked Truth
1/28/2015
We were all born this way! It is something we have no control over. No matter how much we wanted to change it or get rid of it, we cannot deny or hide the fact that were born naked! Yes, you! I can’t believe you had the nerve to be born naked, showing all of your goodies to a doctor that you don’t even know! I sound a bit crazy but I am telling the truth! You and I were born butt-naked and there is nothing we can do about it! This is what God had in mind when He created us!...God thought it was a good idea for us to be born NAKED!!! The first human beings walked around the earth naked too..no big deal! So what is the big deal about being naked? The human body is fascinating to me! Yes, the outer shell is beautiful but our insides are mind blowing! For example, did you know that your large intestine is about 5 feet long!? There is so much stuff that is jam packed into that body of yours and you don’t even know it! Anywhooo, back to being naked. Why does the media make such a big fuss about it? Most importantly, why does the media make such a big deal about women’s bodies being naked? Ads show women half naked and there is nothing wrong with that. On TV, (in the US) men are allowed to go topless, but women are not. If you ask me, there is a double standard going on here that needs to be addressed because I have seen men who have “man boobs” that look just like women’s breast but for some reason they are not censored. (You know I am right.) Can someone please explain this to me? What kind of message is this sending to women and girls? I am so glad you asked! This is telling girls that their bodies are inappropriate and should only be shown in a sexy and provocative way…when we say it’s ok. Hmmmm…. Let that marinate for a bit. There was a campaign going on for a while on social media called FREE THE NIPPLE where girls and women of all ages were promoting equal rights to go topless in public. As a result, girls were posting pictures of themselves with their breast out on Instagram (I am not making this up). Is this extreme? Or is this for a good cause? If you ask me, this whole world is obsessed with FAT! That’s what breasts are…FATTY TISSUE on your chest! Let’s not lose our minds over a nipple or a breast. If you have seen one, you have seen them all. (Watch what I have to say about breasts) Let’s remember the real reason why we have breast! They are life support for babies and for married folk they are pleasure pillows. Each part of our beautiful bodies has a purpose! Do not let social media tell you that your body is only good for sex, or that it should be shown WHEN they say it should. Remember that you are fearfully and wonderfully made. God thinks your body is beautiful and there was no mistake when God created you. God wants you to know that you are beautiful, fully clothed and when you are naked. He not only thinks you are beautiful but He wants you to present yourself in a way that is appropriate and pleasing to Him. To be honest, you shouldn’t show your intimate parts to anyone other than your husband. So ask yourself, “Am I married?” If the answer is no, then keep your breasts covered. This world is unfair and unjust at times, but it is up to us to follow the principles of God which require us to be being holy. You and I are not of this world. We don’t have to do what everyone is doing. We don’t have to wear what everyone else is wearing …or not wearing. You were made to stand out and be different… and nothing is wrong with that! … I’m Cherise, and that’s the NAKED TRUTH XOXO Don’t forget your confidence I Give You Permission To Be A Hoe
1/21/2015
I bet you never thought in a million years that I would tell you that it was ok to be a hoe! Well guess what!?... We all have a little hoe in us! Don't judge me before you watch this video! I hope you dig down deep and pull out that inner hoe that is longing to come out! XOXO Cherise Don't forget your confidence! We Do It Everywhere!
1/6/2015
We all do it! Young, old and middle aged. We do it as soon as we wake up, during the day, in the bathroom, in our rooms, at work, in the car or wherever there is good lighting! What is the “IT” I am talking about? Relax, I am talking about us being guilty of taking selfies! DUH! Even if you have never posted the selfie, you know that you have taken one! And why not take a selfie? Your outfit is on fleek and your hair is layed and your face has been beat by the gods! But there is one problem, no one is around to take your picture. So what do you do? TAKE A SELFIE! AND, if that wasn’t enough you add a filter and give it a cute caption like: “No Caption Needed.” I am not mad at you honey! You are cute! You are all that and a bag of chips with a soda on the side. (Did that make you feel good reading that? Well, it’s true, but let me bring you back down to earth for a moment.) You see, I have nothing wrong with selfies! I take them quite often (@CheriseStyles). Why? Sometimes I am having a good hair day and I have to capture that rare moment in time. Other times I’m bored, there is good lighting, my makeup is really nice OR I have no one to take my picture, so I do it myself. There are several reasons as to why one takes a selfie. The reason for a selfie is not important. The person behind, or in this case, in front of the selfie IS! So what are you saying Cherise? Glad you asked. Simply put: Don’t lose yourself in your selfie! Girls are famous for altering their selfies to enhance or reduce their already beautiful bodies. They make their boobs and butt bigger, they slim down their stomachs and thighs so they can get likes on a post! Why do girls do this? I believe it’s because they lack confidence and self-esteem. They find their self-worth and confidence in social media (Facebook and Instagram) and in the amount of likes they get. The more likes, the higher their confidence. The lower the likes the lower they feel about themselves and their looks. I don’t want you to fall into this trap! I need you to realize that you are more than your selfie, your altered picture or the likes you get. You are a princess, a beautiful young lady who has a personality and a mind of her own. You are fearfully and wonderfully made! You don’t need likes by people you don’t know OR like to make you feel like someone important! You know who you are! Why try to impress people who don’t care about you? Impress yourself by loving YOURSELF and NOT YOUR SELFIE. Slowly stop using filters and editing apps to make yourself look different and start complimenting who you are. What good is a confident looking selfie when in real life you are insecure about who you are and how you look? Don’t just look the part, be the part. Don’t “look confident” BE CONFIDENT! First, Accept who you are! ALL OF YOU, even the parts of you that you consider flaws. Love them and embrace them (be honest with yourself). Next, think about who you are and who you want to be, NOT what others think and NOT who others want you to be. Make sure you follow Gods lead and be who God wants you to be. If you are outspoken with bright ideas, then don’t keep quiet because of what other people think or say. If you are naturally skinny or thick don’t try to altar your bodies in a way that is acceptable to society. Accept yourself first! True confidence is sexy and you don’t need a filter for that! This is a process and it will take some time for you to truly love and accept yourself. Selfies are cute and all, but make sure you love, accept and are honest to the SELF that you are posting. XOXO, Cherise “Don’t forget your confidence.” Go Out With A Bang!
12/31/2014
Can you believe 2014 will be over in less than 24 hours? It’s exciting! I don’t know about you but 2014 was very…eventful, fun, exciting, life-changing, hard, challenging and more! I got rid of a few things, found some things and changed a few things and rediscovered a few things too! Let’s see…. I found out a few things about myself that I never wanted to admit or accept. For one, I have feelings and I get emotional AND THAT’S OKAY! I got rid of past hurts. I realized that hurt, pain and getting offended is inevitable! I cannot avoid my feelings. I have learned to not allow my feelings to run my life! I rediscovered who Cherise is; the part of Cherise that was covered, buried and thrown into an abyss of nothingness. I found her! She is back! The loving, caring, affectionate Cherise! (It's a continuos process.) 2014 has been a year of rediscovery and change for me. What about you? What have you realized about yourself, changed or done differently? I don’t know if you can tell but WE are in this together! As I am constantly telling you to get to know WHO YOU ARE, I am doing the same. It’s a never ending journey. Don’t get discouraged! Isn’t it exciting when you meet someone new? You want to know everything about them! Well! You should get just as excited about getting to know yourself! Believe it or not you are always changing. Things you liked last year, you won’t like this year, AND THAT’S OKAY! Take time to ask yourself questions and figure out what you like, don’t like and what your personality is like! (That was a lot of likes) That’s what I had to do. I had to do a self-check! I had to check myself before I wrecked myself! I was close!... like really close to losing the Cherise that God created me to be! You can’t let the past get in the way of your future! You can’t let boys, family, mistakes, bad habits or your negative thoughts control what you do today or tomorrow or years from now. 2015 is right around the corner and I want you to go out with a BANG! Are there things you need to make right? Need to apologize to a friend/family member? Do you need to apologize to yourself? It is not too late! It took me a whole year and then some to realize things, to change things around, but guess what? I am not done yet! God is not done fixing me up! And God is not done fixing you up either! Philippians 1:6 says: For I am confident of this very thing, that He who began a good work in you will perfect it until the day of Christ Jesus. This just means that God is going to keep on working you! You don’t have to worry, just allow God to help you with whatever it is you need help with. How? It is easy simply ask God for help. It will be challenging! It might get a little difficult, but remember you can do all things with God! AND, it will be worth it! It is time to go out with a bang! Get things right, change some things, learn some things and DO SOME THINGS and be confident about ALL that YOU do! You can’t do it alone! God has your back, front and sides! Come on ladies, this is your time to shine and give it your all! Go into 2015 with your head held HIGH AND SHOULDERS BACK! It is time to go out with a bang! XOXO, Cherise Don’t forget your confidence! ON NO YOU DIDN'T
12/24/2014
Just in time for Christmas season! Do you like expensive things? Do you want expensive gifts for Christmas? Why? What are your motives? Watch and Enjoy!
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